An Uncertain New Year

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It’s nearly 2017. A new year awaits. Will it be a good year, a difficult year, a happy year, a sad year?

One thing is certain, none of us really know. As I look back over my life, every year has had highs & lows. Mostly my life has been exciting & exhilarating. Yes, even the past 6 years fall into that category despite my health failing me.

Each year, no matter my circumstances, new & exciting opportunities have always presented & I have had a sense of purpose.

As I approach this new year, I feel like I am lacking that sense of anticipation I usually have. Maybe because I’m in ridiculous pain with my leg at the moment. Maybe because I know I have major surgery ahead mid year. Maybe because it just feels like more of the same lies ahead. Maybe because everything about my future just feels so uncertain & the reality is I am, for the moment, trapped in a world where I can’t make plans for tomorrow let alone the year ahead.

So, that can all sound rather depressing & if I allow myself to continue thinking that way I will never dare to dream, dare to hope, dare to have faith that there could be something exciting & exhilarating around the corner.

I love this quote from Martin Luther King Jnr

“You don’t have to see the whole staircase, you just have to take the first step”

That’s it! I just need to step into the 1st January 2017 & take each day one at a time, step by step. The details, the plans, the hopes, dreams, twists & turns will unravel as I go. I believe God is ultimately in control. I don’t believe He causes difficult things to happen to us but I do know, by faith, that He gives me the strength, resolve & ability to deal with the good, the bad & the downright awful.

It is an uncertain New Year but every New year is like that. Despite the uncertainties I still want it to be a year filled with purpose, filled with love & joy, filled with strength to deal with the difficult times, filled with hope when things might seem hopeless.

In my uncertainty, I am beginning to feel a glimmer of hope that 2017 will be a beautiful year & that is my hope for all my family, friends & readers xx

 

 

Post Script (7th May 2017)

I wrote the above blog post at the end of last year as the New Year was approaching. I had a sense of losing purpose in my life due to my health. I was enjoying blogging but that was it & I couldn’t see anything ahead in 2017 apart from pain, more surgery, pain, repeat.

3 weeks later, I had the idea to start an online support forum, Medical Musings with Friends, as it was concerning me that many people on other support forums had such complex diseases that didn’t fit neatly into the particular box that these forums needed ticking. I had an overwhelming sense that chronically ill people needed a broader outlet where they could share as much or as little as they liked.

 I started the forum on the 14th January 2017 and a week later, The Mighty published my first article. I nearly didn’t submit the article because I felt I would be wasting my time, I felt my writing wasn’t good enough. In fact the first submission didn’t work as they had a system failure & I received am email 3 weeks after I’d forwarded my first article saying all articles submitted during certain dates must be re submitted. 

I again thought there was little point & was about to delete the email when I suddenly felt, “oh just do it…you’ve got nothing to lose”.

That article was published the next day & resulted in over 1000 likes & countless people reading it & finding the forum. 

The rest as they say is history.

My purpose for recounting this story & sharing via Post Script, is because they go hand in hand. So often when I’ve been at the end of my resources & I’ve felt like there is nothing more but the circumstances that I’ve found myself in….so often that is the moment when amazing things, things beyond my wildest dreams, are about to happen.

I just needed to be prepared to take a couple of steps….start the forum in faith that others would join & not be afraid to submit an article for publication. Those two actions have turned this year into a purposeful & exciting year.

Don’t lose hope if you’re feeling like you can’t see ahead. Opportunities can present from the flicker of a quiet thought. Life can be exciting & amazing, even from the confines of your home. 

Don’t be afraid to explore your ideas & see where they lead. You may be wonderfully surprised 💗

Sam xx

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